Your opinion of yourself should be the most important opinion. When you decide to finally be yourself it is such an amazing relief. Societal norms and expectations are the big weights that are lifted off your shoulders. Live in your truth 💕 Happy Monday 🗣


My Anti New Year’s Resolution


An·ti /ˈan(t)ē,ˈanˌtī/ : “opposed to; against.”

New Year’s Resolution : “a promise to do something differently in the new year”

I do not wish to be constrained and/or restrained to goals that subconsciously seem unobtainable. I have tried the whole New Year’s Resolution thing for years. Go to gym more, eat better, have more me time, blah blah blah. These “resolutions” last all of two weeks. In 2019 I do not want to burden myself with that overwhelming stress of conquering all of these goals that I have made for myself. Also I never understood why we post and tell our New Year’s Resolutions on social media and to other people. Many fail to realize that this possibly makes those goals 10 times more difficult to reach because you put it out there that these goals must be achieved within that 12 month period.

It does not seem plausible for me to set goals when I have not dealt with my toxic and emotionally distressing habits that I have developed over the years. So no, this isn’t your typical New Year’s Resolution list this is the Anti New Year’s Resolution list. I still want to effect change in my upcoming year but I want to make those changes from within. This year I will focus on all of the negative habits that I developed that have hindered my growth thus far. I will make myself aware of their toxicity and kick these bad habits once and for all. These toxic habits and traits include:

  • Looking for others approval before making a decision
  • Allowing others opinions to determine how I perceive myself
  • Loving someone more than I love myself
  • Being afraid of genuinely and fearlessly being me
  • Using anxiety as a crutch as to why I cant live in my truth and speak my mind
  • Not being able to trust myself
  • Projecting my inner insecurities onto others
  • Being defensive

2019 Mantras

  •  Don’t ever let them see you sweat: People can only see what you allow them to see. This does not  mean that you can’t have a moment of weakness but just let it be a  moment and nothing more
  • Mind over matter: Everything is mental. If you have a strong mentality it will help you deal with situations and make rational decisions
  • Good vibes out and prosperity in :You get what you put out. Find the inner strength to stay positive no matter what challenges come your way

My 2019 Social Media Post, ” I am a Queen and will view myself as such. I will take accountability for all of my actions and live my life authentically and unapologetically. Happy 2019″  

IG @napturalle_elite

Snapchat @Tiyy_selina 

Dear Girl


I have seen this post on social media so many different times so I thought it must be a sign that I need to touch on this. Soooo we are often under this misconception that life is a competition. It can’t be, logically who are we competing against when we are all in our own lanes. Subconsciously we feel envious of those closest to us because they are becoming super successful and we feel extremely stagnant. EVERYBODY has or will go through that envious stage. I have envied close friends, family members even my significant other at times. Being envious isn’t always partnered with malicious intent. Sometimes it’s simply being happy for someone but wanting all of those successes to be happening in your life too. You then sit and rack your brain about what they are doing right and what you’re doing wrong which could potentially be helpful but can also drive you insane. My best word of advice that I have learned after years of having a dark mentality partnered with a false reality from envious thoughts is to just enjoy the life that you have been blessed to live. NOBODY’S life is perfect and we all go through trials and tribulations. We need to focus on our own futures and know that sometimes slow and steady does win the race. I have become strong in my spirituality and I am a firm believer that God has a tailored pathway for my life. He presents me with many forks in the roads that are disguised as decisions. I haven’t always made the right decisions when need be but I realized that God kept giving me the opportunity to make that right decision even if it was in different situations and at completely different times in my life.

Self-Positive reinforcements are essential in the development of our character. We have to be able to encourage and motivate ourselves and sometimes things will happen that we will not understand until an ample amount of time has passed. There has been so many situations where I have wanted and wanted something in my possession, both tangible and intangible objects, but they never made its way to me. As I get older I develop an altered mindset. At one point in my life I would simply be upset that I did not get what I wanted but now I try and understand why what I wanted may not have been good for me at all or at that particular time in my life. I constantly find myself making pros and cons list in my head and whenever the bad outweighs the good I thank God for foreseeing tragic events that could have potentially ruined all of my growth that I have experienced.

Dear girl who sees all of her friends and family experiencing different aspects of life do not ever feel like you aren’t doing enough. Who has the autonomy to measure what enough is? You do. You set your own expectations and create your own experiences confidently knowing they are the right decisions for you. Never worry about what other people are doing because you are taking energy away from your own growth. Stay true to who you are and life will take you where you are meant to be.

Disclaimer:  I do not own any of these photos.

30 Day Fitness Challenge #sbnfitness💪🏾

Challenges, Fitness


So I will be starting my 30 day fitness challenge tomorrow. I want to lead a better lifestyle and improve my health. My eating habits aren’t the best and I am really trying my best to turn things around while I’m still young. So here are the 4 simple rules of this challenge!

1. You cannot drink any SODA OR JUICE. Also make sure to drink 8 bottles of water a day (it might be good to plan ahead and set daily alarms of when your next water break should be) If you want to add a little flavor to your water add some limes, lemons, strawberries, cucumbers and maybe even some pomegranate.

2. Make sure to hit the gym at least 3 times a week. Now I find this a little challenging with working a full time job and going to grad school full time. But I want to lead a healthier lifestyle so I make time in my busy schedule. I personally enjoy hitting the gym early in the morning then heading to work just so that I get a jump start on my day. At a later date I will post my exact workout routines because they do differ each day.

3. Every time you use the bathroom you MUST do 30 squats. This is something that I like to do throughout my day just to keep myself alert and moving. Now this may be a little awkward to do at work when someone is in the stall right beside yours but it’s in the rules so you gotta do it 😉

4. When you wake up in the morning do a 30sec. plank.  This is pretty self explanatory this will give your abs a mighty morning wake up. This is really good because if your problem area is your stomach then this 30 sec plank each morning will definitely show you some results. And you can even increase the time from 30 secs when you want to challenge yourself a bit.

I encourage you all to participate in this challenge with me, with the hashtag #sbnfitness💪🏾. I will be posting weekly picture updates of my progress. I’m so excited to see my results. Also look out for  what I will be eating while doing this fitness challenge ❤️

Does your focus matter?


Church home: Rehoboth Ministries, Buffalo, New York

You gotta have a focus that matters. You have to figure out and understand what the center of your focus is.

In my life God has something greater planned for me. Don’t just focus on today. God wants to give us blessings on blessings. 

You have got to have order and structure. These blessings aren’t just for me. It’s for my children and my children’s children. (The line of succession)

It is not how fast you are going, it’s about how much the road can handle.

Are you truly capable of handling the blessings that God will put in your life ? 

Positive outlooks (surrounding yourself with people going in the direction that you are going in)

There are three forms of focus. No focus, the wrong focus and the right focus:

What you think is what you say

What you say is what you do

What you do becomes a habit

Then a habit then becomes your character.

So you have to focus your thoughts on the right things.

I left this service feeling resilient, motivated and empowered to put my energy into the right things. It is so easy for us to put so much energy into things of negative nature but in turn can’t put that same foot forward when it comes to positivity. I want all who reads this to go into their upcoming week with goals on what you wish to focus on. I want to focus on being a bit more patient and not letting things, people, and situations dictate my mood. Focus on my needs and having some me time meaning hitting up the gym to relieve some stress in a productive way. Focus on managing my time better and being more productive in the time that I do have. And mainly just focusing on God himself because I can all things through him.